


If you were waiting for a sign...

by proseoflife



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-02-07
Updated: 2016-02-16
Packaged: 2018-05-18 19:26:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,468
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5940352
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/proseoflife/pseuds/proseoflife
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A series of unexpected events over a course of a lifetime, that leads you to ask the question: If you were waiting for a sign, then this is it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Life is A Dance Floor

**_i_ **

 

It was the last week of Summer, and the last week they would have any real time to spend with one another before they all headed off to different Colleges. Clarke, Raven, and Bellamy had been best friends since they were 5, and here they were sitting at a café in Bali, soaking up that beautiful sun over Kuta beach, reflecting on what was and what was about to be. This very moment was what life was all about: Love, Laughter, and Friendship – wherever they were in the world, this moment would be theirs to keep forever.

 

“So what are we doing tonight guys?” Raven asked, snapping out of her own daze

 

“What about that party on the beach tonight?” Bellamy suggested

 

Clarke shrugged, “Sounds like another night of getting wasted on the beach”

 

Bellamy laughed, “We’re in Bali, and it’s what you do. Besides, we only have a few nights left.”

 

He was right, Clarke knew, but still she felt like all she had done these past two weeks was get completely drunk and not have any real experiences. Bali was a beautiful place, and atmosphere was one of a kind, but she didn’t expect that this was all they would be doing. Though, she was having the time of her life, and she reminded herself she was still young and that this was what young people did.

 

All of her life, Clarke had always felt she didn’t belong. She couldn’t quite explain or describe what the feeling was, or where it stemmed from; she just felt like this timing was her time. Her mother, Abby, had always said Clarke had an ‘old soul’ and that one day everything would make sense to her. But that ‘one day’ was taking it’s time, and Clarke was impatient.

 

“Party on the beach it is.” Clarke smiled, taking another sip of her coffee. “On one condition though,” she added.

 

Both Raven and Bellamy looked puzzled by this.

 

“Tomorrow we go and meditate in Ubud.”

 

It was Raven that let out a small laugh first, although nothing Clarke said really surprised her anymore. She was always coming out with strange requests, but she wouldn’t be Clarke otherwise and that’s why she was Raven’s best friend.

 

Bellamy, on the other hand, rolled his eyes. Clarke was a strange girl, but a strange girl he was always fascinated with. Even had a slight crush on at one point in his life. It started when his hormones were rampant, and Clarke was growing into a woman – curves and all. He had never looked at Clarke as a romantic interest before, but on his 14th birthday Clarke had worn a black dress to his birthday party. She wore heels, too, that accentuated her legs. For the first time, in Bell’s life, Clarke looked like a woman. That same night, he met another girl who called herself Echo. It was a night of firsts for Bellamy.

 

“Deal” they both said in unison.

 

 

 

 

**_ii_ **

****

****

 

It was ceremonious that the three of them were sitting on their balcony, swigging shots of whatever they had left over. It was gin this time, and Raven decided to add some lime to sweeten up the hard taste of gin.

 

“Clarke!” Raven yelled out from the balcony, “Ready yet?”

 

Bellamy’s mouth dropped first, closely by Raven’s bulging eyes, as Clarke walked out of her bedroom dressed in a tight fitting black dress. It clearly reminded Bellamy of his 14th birthday party.

 

“Whoa girl” Raven drooled out almost, easily impressed with how hot her friend was looking.

 

“This okay?” Clarke nervously asked, always second-guessing her decisions on what she wore.

 

“Man if I was into girls, I’d be getting a lady-boner right now” Raven giggled.

 

Clarke laughed, “What about you Bell? Getting a man-boner?”

 

Bellamy didn’t respond.

 

Both Clarke ad Raven laughed and giggled.

 

“Let’s go!” Raven excitedly said, almost pushing her friends out of the door.

 

They spent an hour at each nightclub they visited, of the many beachfront hotels that lined the popular Kuta beach. At every bar they went to, they always had at least a table full of random tourists and locals joining them, taking photos, laughing, drinking, and dancing. But it was the sound of Kuta beach that really peaked their interest – all they could hear was loud music, and hundreds of half-naked bodied jumping up and down in unison.

 

It was where they wanted to be.

 

The hours seemed to fly by, and before Clarke knew it, it was 3am. Bellamy was lost in a sea of bodies, and Raven was talking to one of the guys they met a few hours earlier. This made Clarke smile, as she sipped on another drink.

 

“Hey can you hold these?”

 

A pair of shoes were being waved in front of Clarke’s face, and Clarke looked over her shoulders to see if the girl in front of her was talking to someone else.

 

“Please?” the girl laughed moving her free hand to the mass of people in front of them, signally that she wanted to jump in there.

 

Clarke understood, and took the girls shoes and watched as she floated in amongst the bodies. They all looked alike, but she was different. Her hair was dark, long, and messy. And while everyone was jumping up and down, she was swaying side to side while her arms floated left, right, and everywhere in between.

 

“So, why aren’t you dancing?”

 

Clarke must have been so lost in space that she didn’t see the girl reappear in front of her, which took her by surprise, choking a little on her drink.

 

“Not co-ordinated enough, I suppose” Clarke finally managed to respond, which only caused the other girl to laugh. Probably at her expense.

 

“I’m Lexa” she smiled.

 

“Clarke.”

 

A moment of silence engulfed the air, irrespective that the music was so loud that it would overwhelm any situation you found yourself. But this silence was comfortable, and confusing, and surprising.

 

“Wanna get out of here?” Lexa asked, surprising Clarke.

 

She scanned the room quickly to see if she could see Bellamy and Raven, but when she couldn’t, she simply nodded and took Lexa’s hand.

 

 

 

**_iii_ **

****

****

Lexa had a moped big enough for two, and she indicated to Clarke to jump on the back. They rode off, and Clarke held tightly onto Lexa’s waist for what seemed like hours trying to navigate through busy streets – even at 4 in the morning. When Lexa finally parked the moped, and switched off the engine, Clarke really had no idea of her surroundings. She knew they were south, but hadn’t seen this part of Bali.

 

“Um, where are we?” Clarke cautiously asked, was now a good time to second-guess her decision to ride off with a stranger?

 

Lexa laughed quietly, as she unbuckled her helmet. “Relax Clarke” she extended her hand once again to Clarke, who accepted it as if it were a natural part of life. With her other hand, she took the sack that was tied to her moped and led Clarke down a narrow, concrete, steep set of steps.

 

She could hear the ocean, so she knew it was a beach. Although, Bali was surrounded by ocean, and she still knew that could be anywhere. But she followed anyway, even if these steps seemed like they were never going to end.

 

“Almost there” Lexa spoke softly.

 

Clarke could finally see the last couple of steps, and although everything was still pitch-black, her eyes had readjusted and she could see the outline of an ocean with a cave close by.

 

Lexa let go of Clarke’s hand, and untied the sack she was holding. It was a rolled up sleeping bag, and she placed it on the now sandy beach. She took off her shoes, and waved for Clarke to join her to sit.

 

The waves crashed harshly, and high tide must have only just turned. The sun was creeping up, with the outline of the horizon behind them. Everything was becoming clear, and finally Clarke saw the majestic of wherever it was they were. It didn’t matter, this was what heaven looked like.

 

“This place is beautiful” Clarke finally said aloud.

 

Lexa smiled, and turned to face Clarke. It was the first time that Clarke saw her piercing green eyes, and then she suddenly felt self-conscious. Now fully aware that she had been out amongst the sweat, and the heat of people, for over 6 hours. She realised she must look completely frightening, but as if Lexa had read her mind somehow, the girl had taken Clarke’s hand once more, and gently caressed to ease any nerve she might have.

 

It worked, and Clarke relaxed once more into Lexa’s touch.

 

“Clarke?”

 

She was lost in thought, but the sound of her name caught her attention, “Mm?”

 

“Let’s go for a swim.”

 

Clarke laughed, “Um, I don’t have anything to swim in.”

 

Lexa nodded, “That’s the point.” And within a split moment, Lexa had stood up and started taking off her clothes until she was completely naked.

 

Clarke was intrigued, but nervous, and yet fascinated all in the same breath. Lexa had a tattoo on her back, one of her ribs, and also one on her arm. Her body was flawless, which made Clarke even more self-conscious, but she watched intently as the other girl disappeared into the ocean.  


“Are you coming Clarke?” she could hear faintly from the afar.

 

She hesitated. She barely knew this girl, and yet she felt excited. Without another thought, Clarke undressed, neatly piling her clothes on top of one another. A moment later, the crisp, cold water was covering her now naked body. She paddled towards the other girl, quietly praising that her feet could still touch the ocean floor, not wanting to down anytime soon.

 

Lexa wrapped her legs around Clarke’s waist, pulling herself closer into Clarke. “Is this okay?”

 

Clarke froze. Suddenly she was wrapped around a naked Lexa.

 

She didn’t know how it started, well she knew how it started, but from the second Lexa asked if she was okay, to fingers and mouths being inside and upon one another was where it got hazy; caught up and captivated by her. Moans crept out of one another, and Clarke came quickly. She was thirsty for more, and she quickly recovered from her orgasm to attack Lexa’s neck. Her fingers thrusting inside Lexa’s centre, and Lexa unable to control her audible sounds; clearly not wanting to either. Between the sounds of Lexa’s moans, and the waves hitting the shore, everything about this moment was surreal, intense, and sublime. When Lexa came, Clarke came again.

 

That had never happened before.

 

And Clarke knew after tonight, it would probably never happen again.


	2. Bloodstream

**_i_ **

 

The months had passed by quite quickly, and already Christmas break was approaching. Had Clarke really completed her first semester at Berkeley? San Francisco was an amazing, bright, colorful, and eclectic city. The night life was turbulent in a good way, but although she made time to at least have a ‘girls night out’ once a week, her studies always came first. After all, she was studying medicine: the only field that ever made sense to her.

  
Clarke’s weeks were always set out and planned carefully. On Monday nights she would set aside an hour (or two) for a skype date with Raven, who remained where they all grew up in Maryland. Instead of going to College, Raven applied for a Mechanic internship and was quickly accepted from all 7 places she applied, but chose to remain close to home. On Wednesday afternoon’s, she would skype Bellamy who was at UCLA on a Basketball scholarship. There were some weekends where he would drive up to see Clarke, and whenever she could get away (and Bell had a game on) she would drive down to watch. Thursday was ladies night, and the one night a week she could afford to go out.

  
The first month at Berkeley was the most difficult month of Clarke’s life. Every hour of every day she questioned her decision to move to the other side of the country to study medicine. It was knowing the Bellamy was close by that got her through those nerves, and the intense second-guessing. It was also the first time she truly felt alone, and that she couldn’t relate or connect to anyone on an emotional level. There were plenty of people in her classes that she was physically attracted to, and even went on a couple of dates, but the conversation was minimal and Clarke was bored after a few minutes usually. Then she met Finn Collins.

  
She had met Finn in her second month, at a party that she wasn’t even going to attend. When her room-mate Anya had practically dragged her kicking in screaming to, as she  calls it, ‘get out of her pyjamas and doing something fun that’s not on a Thursday night’, that’s where she met Finn, Jasper and Monty.

  
Monty was quiet, she noted, while Jasper talked enough for both him and Monty (and quite possibly the whole room). Whereas Finn lit up the whole room with his smile, and it was quickly what drew Clarke in. His smile, and his mystery.

  
It wasn’t long after that, they began dating. And it wasn’t long until the memories of feeling uneasy, nervous, and alone, simply ceased to exist. Clarke was enjoying Berkeley, and life. And the months had passed, and now it was time for her to head back home for Christmas.

 

 

 

 

**_ii_ **

 

 

“Clarke!” Raven yelled from afar, as she saw the girl slowly come down the escalators at the airport. She had been at the airport for almost two hours, first waiting for Bellamy’s flight to land, and now Clarke.

  
Clarke could see her best friend, and she found it hard to contain her excitement, and also disapproval of the people in front of her, that took up the entire left and right side of the escalator when all she wanted to do was run into the arms of Raven. As soon as she reached the ground, she dropped her bags and leapt into Raven.

  
“Six months is far too long” Clarke finally managed to get out, after a long embrace.

  
She saw Bellamy fast approach, as he joined in on the three-way hug. They were finally altogether again, and they knew it had been a long time coming. Although the months seemed to pass quickly for all three of them, in their own ways, they knew that there ‘seeing each other every day’ to ‘seeing each other on holidays and special occasions’ was difficult, and sometimes unbearable. But they never mentioned it to each other; it was a silent understanding they all shared equally.

  
As soon as Raven pulled up into Clarke’s driveway, they could all smell Abby’s cooking. And after they ate dinner, and Bellamy went home, Raven and Clarke were on Clarke’s bed discussing and debriefing the past six months. Clarke spoke of Finn, whilst Raven mentioned Bellamy’s sister Octavia and how they had been spending a lot of time together.

  
“So, does this mean what I think it means?” Clarke asked

  
“I guess I have a lady-boner for her” Raven stated matter-of-factly.

  
Clarke giggle and rolled her eyes, “Does Bell know?”

  
Raven shrugged, “Nothing has really happened yet.”

  
“Yet.” Clarke said knowingly.

  
“I can’t believe you have to go back two days after New Years’” Raven whined, wanting to change the subject but also not wanting to think about having to take Clarke back to the airport.

  
Clarke sighed, “Let’s just enjoy these two weeks, and then we can cry and complain.”

  
“Deal.”

  
“So, whose party are we going to for New Years?” Clarke asked

 

 

 

**_iii_ **

 

 

She couldn’t quite believe her eyes when she saw Lexa simply standing there. Of all the places she could ever run into this girl, again, it was at Wells’ dad’s house a few streets away on New Year’s Eve. Clarke, Bell, and Raven all had gone to school with Wells, but he was always an introvert and kept to himself mainly. His Dad was always known to host extraordinary events at his house that was big enough to be mistaken for a mansion. He was the CEO of some massive corporation, and Wells was in line to eventually take over, which is probably why he kept to himself – the three of them often remarked quietly to themselves.

  
So when she saw the girl from Bali, standing in the hallway waiting to use the bathroom (out of about ten other people all waiting to use the facilities) she had to pinch herself to believe this was real. The last she saw of Lexa was when she dropped her back to where she was staying. It would have been 9 in the morning when they had gotten back, and Clarke invited her up to at least ‘wash up’ but Lexa declined, simply saying she wanted to remember everything about that night, the way it was now.

  
Clarke didn’t know if she was being romantic, or wanting to escape – again drowning in her own doubts. But either way, she saw Lexa ride off, went upstairs, and stood silently in tears under the shower – allowing her body to be engulfed by all of her emotions. She wasn’t sad, and they weren’t sad tears, but they were tears – tired? Overwhelmed maybe?

  
Maybe it was nerves, or the sudden thoughts of Finn, but Clarke didn’t call out to Lexa. Instead, she walked the other way to find her friends in amongst the madness of New Year’s Eve. She saw Bellamy first, and besides Finn’s smile, Bellamy came in at a very close second. He always seemed to smile whenever Clarke entered the room, and she knew that and appreciated it for what it was.

  
“Where’s Raven?” Clarke yelled out

  
“Probably feeling up my sister?” Bellamy laughed, as he pointed across the room to where Raven and Octavia were all over each other.

  
Clarke’s eyes were almost popping out, “Did you know?”

  
“I do now” he laughed.

  
“You ok?” Clarke asked.

  
Bellamy nodded, “It’s my sister, and I’m always going to be protective of her – but Raven’s my best friend. And if my sister is going to end up with anyone, I’d rather it be with someone I trust.”

  
Clarke genuinely smiled. She knew how hard it was for Bellamy to stop thinking of his little sister as his ‘little sister.’ And of all the immature and obnoxious things Bellamy has done over the years, she was proud that in this moment – where it mattered – he was maturing, and growing.

  
It was two minutes until midnight, and Clarke didn’t want to be in amongst the madness of people/bodies rushing to find their midnight kiss. She had contemplated calling Finn, but instead opted to go outside and get some air.

  
She looked up at the stars, and for the first time in a long time, she saw the stars in the sky. She missed this in San Francisco; being still. Clarke could see her friends inside, Raven with Octavia and Bellamy with Echo. As much as she wanted to share this moment with them, she also saw how happy all of them were in there. And that made her happy; reflective, but happy regardless.

  
There was a moment where she almost went back inside, knowing that in a couple of days, she would be back on a plane to San Francisco. But then she saw her again, and this time – Lexa had seen her too.

  
Before either of them knew it, midnight had struck, fireworks were going off in the distance, and the air was filled with noise of laughter and joy. Lexa took Clarke into her arms, bring their faces together, and in an instant their lips once again met.

  
After a few moments, they both came up for air. Staring intently into one each other's eyes, it was as if they were back on that beach in Bali again, and no time had passed. Clarke held Lexa’s face, and kissed her once more.

  
"Wanna get out of here?” Clarke asked, to a very receptive Lexa.

  
Lexa took Clarke’s hand, and let Clarke lead her to wherever she wanted to go.

  
“Where are we?” Lexa asked, and it all seemed a little déjà vu for both girls.

  
“My house” Clarke quickly responded. “Well, my mom’s but she isn’t here.”

  
Clarke opened the door with one hand, ensuring that she wasn’t letting go of the other girl’s hand, and then led Lexa upstairs to her room. She wasn’t interested in showing Lexa around, or being polite, or all of the other pleasantries you’re supposed to do when you bring someone home. Enough time had passed since their lips had met, and all Clarke desired to do was close the distance between them. And as she closed her bedroom door behind her, she brought Lexa into her arms and did what she wanted to do for the last 20 minutes.

  
Lexa wasted no time and pushed Clarke up against the girl’s bedroom door, planting a mixture of soft and hard kisses all over Clarke. Her cheeks – soft kisses. Her chin – another soft kiss. Then her neck – she softly kissed, until a small whimper came out of Clarke’s mouth, enticing Lexa to kiss harder. Her lips – soft, then hard, then soft again.

  
Clarke wanted more; she desired more, and in this moment she forgot about everything else and made Lexa hers. Clarke didn’t like the thought or idea of ownership. The term “my boyfriend” or “my girlfriend” all seemed too possessive for Clarke. But in this moment, she wanted to claim Lexa and her body.

  
And she did. Again, and again.

  
The following morning Clarke woke up to an empty bed. Lexa had left a note which simply read, “You’ve gotten into my bloodstream.” She held the note tightly against her chest, falling asleep again.


	3. Hanging On

**_i_**  
  
“Clarke?”  
  
  
The blonde had turned around quickly, hearing her name being yelled from afar. But who she saw, took her by complete and utter surprise.  
  
  
“Lexa?” Clarke responded in shock. “Wow, it’s been awhile” she said looking the girl up and down.

 

It had been awhile. Three years, as a matter of fact, since they last saw each other. Three years had passed and in that time Clarke was a semester away from graduating from Berkeley, and three years into a relationship with Finn Collins.

 

Which is why they were currently in Central Park, New York City, celebrating their anniversary weekend. It was a surprise that Finn had organized for Clarke, as she had always teased him about never wanting to travel outside of California. It was the truth, though, that he hadn’t traveled. Not that Clarke seemed to mind.  


“Well” Lexa smiled, “I always seem to run into you in those most unexpected places.”

 

Clarke laughed, although awkwardly remembering the two times they had met before. Both times ending in being naked with each other, which brought a bright red burn to her cheeks. She could feel Finn getting closer to her, claiming ownership or possession even. “Sorry, this is Finn” she introduced the two.

 

“And this is Costia.”

 

They all exchanged momentary pleasantries. Quick smiles, nods of the head, and small-talk even. Lexa explained that she met Clarke in Bali, and then how they again met at a New Year’s party some months later.

 

“How very _serendipitous_ ” Costia stated, and Clarke could hear the slight sound of bitterness that came from her choice of words. Clarke couldn’t help but wonder if Costia know who she was, or what she was or had been to Lexa. _Had she been anything at all? No, probably not._

 

After that New Year’s party, it wasn’t that Clarke didn’t try to contact Lexa – or at least find out _how to_. They had never exchanged phone numbers, in fact they barely said more than a couple of words to one another. To Clarke, though, Lexa was an enigma – one that kept reappearing out of nowhere.

 

She tried to subtly ask Well’s, once, if he knew who Lexa was - but he didn’t. She even went as far as to ask his dad, Jaha, as well. He didn’t know either, and Clarke gave up looking. She went back to San Francisco, and back to the life she was only just beginning to start.

 

“Well, we should get going” Lexa said, snapping Clarke out from her train of thought.

 

“Oh” she said defeated, “of course, yeah.”

 

“May we meet again” the other girl smiled, and turned to walk off into the distance.  
  
Clarke watched Lexa come in and out of her life at the drop of a hat. It was unnerving, and unsettling. Who was this girl, and why did she show up in Clarke’s life in the most random moments. She had never questioned it before – these chance meetings – so now that she was, she didn’t want to be here anymore. She wanted to go back to her life she made for herself in San Francisco. She wanted it to just be her and Finn, back home and living their simple life.

 

Most of all, she wanted to stop running into this girl. A girl she knew nothing about. And never would. Because she kept leaving her life as quickly as she entered it.

 

 

 

 ** _ii_**  
  
After they left the park, they went and visited the Empire State Building and took various selfies and happy-snaps, followed by a nice dinner at Kat’z Deli which Clarke promptly reminded Finn that this is where Meg Ryan famously faked an orgasm.

 

They were lying in bed, back in their hotel room, flicking through cable channels when all of a sudden Finn had turned the TV off.

 

“Who was that girl?”

 

“Who Lexa?” Clarke stalled. “She’s no-one babe.”

 

“She didn’t seem like no-one” Finn quickly retorted.

 

Clarke shrugged, “I don’t know what else to say… I barely know her.”

 

She could tell he wanted to keep poking and prodding until she gave him something more concrete than ‘she’s no-one’ but what more could Clarke say? She was a girl she slept with? Twice? And one of those times was when they started dating? She couldn’t tell him any of that, besides it wasn’t as if she knew she was going to keep bumping into this girl at various times and places.

 

“You two just seem to have” Finn started, although trying to think of the right words to use.

 

“Have what?” Clarke asked, a little annoyed now.

 

“I don’t know!” Finn snapped back. “But I don’t like it.”

 

“You don’t like what?” Clarke yelled. She knew she had no right to yell, because she knew exactly what Finn was trying to say, or to ask. They had _chemistry_. They had _unfinished business_. Or maybe it was finished, she didn’t know. And she was trying to not care. “Look, I’m going to go downstairs for awhile and let you cool off.”

 

Finn rolled his eyes, “Do whatever you want Clarke, you will anyway.”

 

She picked herself up off the bed, gathered her things, and made a point in slamming the door shut. This was not how she expected to spending her anniversary weekend with the boy she loved.

 

 

 

 ** _iii_**  
  
Clarke didn’t know why she was downstairs at the bar. She didn’t want to be there; she wanted to be back upstairs making up with Finn. But as she took another sip of her third vodka (straight) she started to feel less like herself, and more like someone else.

 

She tried calling Bellamy several times, leaving several messages to call her back. She called Raven, but no answer. She even called Octavia, in the hopes that Raven might be with her. She sent a text to her mom, and even sent a few text messages to Anya – who after three years, still lived with Clarke.

 

Another sip of her vodka, but this time she added lime to it. It reminded her of Bali. It reminded her of how Bali felt. And it reminded her of everything Bali meant to her. And then she saw her, again.

 

“Jesus Christ” Clarke almost yelled at the girl who was standing behind the bar.

 

It took Lexa by surprise too, “Clarke what are you doing here?”  
  
  
“I could ask you the same thing”

 

Lexa laughed, “We really need to stop meeting like this Clarke.”

 

“Like what?” Clarke asked, taking another sip of her drink. Her head felt delicate, and her body was flushed. “Like completely out of the blue, you come into my life and quickly leave again.” She didn’t mean to be so candid.

 

Clarke watched as the other girl bit down on her bottom lip. She could almost hear the thoughts churning away, but she remained still and silent. This only seemed to infuriate Clarke even more than she already was. She wanted this girl to speak, to say something honest at least. To return her honesty, but she stood silently instead.

 

“I have to go” Clarke stood up, and left a twenty on the counter top. She quickly rushed off, opting to not look back. Her heart pounding, and her breathing intensified. But when she heard her name being called, she looked back.

 

“I can’t Lexa” she quivered, trying hard not to break down and cry. She didn’t know why she was getting so emotional, blaming partly on the alcohol probably, but seeing Lexa again – after all these years – wasn’t helping her emotional state.

 

Lexa took Clarke into her arms, though, not listening to the other girl’s pleas. She held Clarke into a soft embrace, with reassuring ‘it’s okay’ and ‘I’m here.’ They stood in amongst the busy streets of New York for what seemed like an eternity. Probably the longest waking-encounter they’ve ever had, combined.

 

“Take me somewhere” Clarke muffled into Lexa’s neck.

 

“I have to finish my shift” Lexa started, “but after that, we’ll go get a hot chocolate.”  


She walked Lexa back to the bar, and opted to sit at the end of the bar occasionally stealing glances at the girl. Who always returned those glances. It was wrong, she knew it, but nothing felt so right.

 

It was an hour and a half before Lexa had finally finished her shift, and she took Clarke to a nice little place three blocks away. Everyone seemed to know who Lexa was, and immediately started pouring the girl a drink. She waved them off, and said she changed her order to two hot chocolates this time. Lexa found a booth, and waited for Clarke to sit before she decided to sit beside her rather than opposite. It was the small things that Clarke observed the most.

 

She had never seen Lexa in this type of light before, or for this amount of time before. Bali was pitch black, and New Year’s was also dark. She never knew how tentative and caring this other girl was, but she imagined her to be.

 

“So” they both said in unison.

 

Clarke chucked first, quickly followed by Lexa.

 

“Who are you?” Clarke asked, shaking her head in disbelief.

 

Her green eyes looked into Clarke’s blue eyes with wonderment, and an intensity she’d never felt from someone before. This girl was astonishingly beautiful, and she did things to Clarke’s stomach and head.

 

Not too many words were exchanged between both girls, as they opted for silence, and enjoying their hot chocolate instead. Words didn’t need to be said, although plenty of questions were desired to be asked.

 

“Come on Clarke, I’ll walk you back to the hotel.” Lexa said, after she saw Clarke yawn into her hands.

It caused her to yawn as well, and both girls knew it was time to say goodbye again.

 

The walk back, was in silence as well, although Lexa randomly pointed out different things to Clarke and Clarke looked around at the city that never sleeps. She held Lexa’s hand for most of the walk back, and Lexa tightly squeezed – for the most part. When they reached the entrance, neither of them really knew what to say, and neither of them wanted to break away from whatever crazy moment they were sharing.

 

Lexa bit her bottom lip again.

 

“Why do you do that?” Clarke finally asked.

 

She looked down at the ground, and then straight back up at Clarke again, and into those piercing blue eyes. “Because, I’m afraid of you Clarke.”

 

“Why?” It was a question she didn’t really know if she wanted the answer to, yet asked anyway.

 

Lexa shrugged. She didn’t know where to start in how to answer, what seemed like a simple question. Nothing was further from the truth though. It wasn’t a simple question.

 

It never would be.


End file.
